Sexual Healing. By Liza L
In this ongoing series, our resident Reiki Master Teacher shows us that it’s so easy to offer yourself much-needed comfort when you need it.
Sexual Healing: Say It, Love
Unlocking our throat chakra might be the key to our heart’s desires (and it’s so easy to do).
Something that’s often lost when we talk about speaking is the true meaning of self-expression: how we communicate with others and how we communicate with ourselves. If your throat chakra is off in any way, it can make your communication off, too.
As with most of everything, it starts with you.
If it’s true that how we treat others is a reflection of how we feel about ourselves, what are the conversations you’re having with yourself? Do you tell yourself you’re beautiful? Do you honor your body as it ages, thanking it for all its hard work through the years? Do you look in the mirror and smile at yourself, your most beloved old friend?
If we were honest, most of us don’t do this. We tell ourselves stories about losing weight, make appointments to hide our aging, scorn ourselves for not doing more or being better.
It almost seems ridiculous to discuss the conversations we have with others until our conversations we have with ourselves are consistently loving.
Let’s assume you’re someone who’s had a full life or ups and downs and well-earned warrior status. But you don't speak very nicely to yourself. And then you get into a relationship with someone else. Sometimes they can help us to change things around. But we all know how this goes, right? Something goes wrong and we can’t express ourselves. Or, perhaps, if our inner voice isn’t a nice one, it gives us poor self-esteem. We say things we don’t mean. We people-please. We’re shy or anxious. And this applies to any relationship we hope to have, whether it’s work, home, intimate or otherwise.
Another way throat chakra imbalance shows itself is if someone just says things without thinking. This person isn’t bold or confident, they’re clumsy and can cause serious damage. I think we can all agree we’ve met a few people like this.
When the throat chakra is balanced, you’re speaking from a place of honesty and respect, for both you and those around you. This is very difficult for the people-please types, because for them, they will have to live with the possibility of people walking away. Likewise, those who are speaking from a place of manipulation have to be okay with not being able to get what they want.
Love doesn’t always refer to intimacy, but when everyone is honest, the love can grow and endure. Because loving your partner also includes bonding physically, it’s important—very important—to communicate what you want and need in every situation, sex included. Are you someone who isn’t comfortable communicating about your needs in bed? Start with one thing. If your partner is caring they will respect you using your voice.
How to balance your throat chakra:
- Blue (Period!) As blue is the color of your throat chakra, bring more blue into your life in any way—starting with your clothing.
- Just Breathe. Taking long, beautiful, fortifying breaths—without distractions!—are an excellent way to open your throat chakra. Our throat is the carrier of those breaths, remember.
- Get Stoned. Make friends with a crystal or two in a blue shade that speaks to you. Try amazonite, turquoise (great for all healing!), aquamarine, lapis lazuli
- Stretch It Out. When’s the last time you gave your neck the TLC it deserves? Aside from speaking, the neck and throat is hard at work making sure we receive the nourishment we need to survive. It contains so many important nerves that travel throughout your entire being. Focus on your throat for a minute. What does it need? Stretching? Massage? At the very least, gently hold your hands over your throat and say “thank you” for all its hard work.
- Simply: Ham. Ham is the mantra for the throat chakra. Sit in a quiet space, picture yourself surrounded by blue light, and breathe out your mantra.
- Create Your Own Mantra. If you need a place to start, try something like this: I speak from a place of love and authenticity. My voice is
- Write It Down. Try keeping a journal to record your thoughts and honor your voice.
On the larger scale, think of what a world we would live in if everything we said came from a place of love. Don’t forget that the all-important key to communication is listening, whether it’s with yourself or with others.
Sexual Healing. Seriously…What’s Sexier Than The Sun?
Balancing your Solar Chakra will bring you the confidence you need, whenever you need it.
Here’s the thing about the sun. We know that it’s a star that rises and sets. We acknowledge what it does for our plants and heart and spirit (and so much more). We like the feeling of the sun when it hits our faces. We rely on the sun to make our days brighter and warmer.
Truly, what is more, powerful than the sun?
In energy healing, we acknowledge that the sun in the sky is a daily blessing, but the real sun is within all of us.
Your third chakra is your Solar Chakra, located, appropriately in your solar plexus (it’s sometimes called the Solar Plexus Chakra), above your belly button.
Ever met someone who was “pure sunshine”? There’s a good chance their Solar Chakra is in healthy balance. You might describe someone like this: “they’re so warm” or “they just glow.” They may exude confidence or have a smile that lights the room. Everything seems easy for them, they know what they want and they usually get it.
All chakras are their healthiest when they are open and in balance. When the Solar Chakra is out of balance, it may show up in these ways: eating disorders, digestive/bowel disorders, stomach problems and aches, and lack of nutrition. Solar Chakra imbalance is also associated with low libido and sexual dysfunction, as well as depression and anxiety. Those who are narcissistic and have low self-confidence may have a Solar Chakra imbalance.
Place both hands on Solar Chakra (right above your belly button) imagine yourself surrounded by warm, yellow light, yellow is the color associated with the Solar Chakra. Take some deep breaths. What is your Solar Chakra telling you right now? To get a true chakra read, lift your hands a few inches away and hold them there. What does this energy feel like? Do you feel in balance? Out of balance?
Think of your Solar Chakra when you read through the suggestions for helping you feel your best, below:
Tips for Balancing Your Solar Chakra:
- Greet the sun every day. In yoga, these are called sun salutations, and you don’t need to be a practitioner to open yourself up to welcome the sun. Whip open the curtains wherever you are and say “hello.” Take your coffee outside. When‘s the last time you thanked the sun for all its great work for us?
- Affirm. Affirmations do not work for everyone, but so long as they don’t have a gas-lighting effect, go ahead and try some key phrases with your hands placed over your Solar Chakra: I am confident; I am successful; I am enough. Or—make up your own.
- Rock it out. Stones great for balancing our Solar Chakra include citrine, amber, calcite, tiger's eye, pyrite, yellow jasper, lemon quartz—and many more with a warm, yellowy hue.
- Light my fire. Saffron, musk, ginger, and sandalwood are amongst the “warm” scents that help keep our Solar Chakra happy and in balance. Because the element associated with the Solar Chakra is fire, go ahead and light these babies up in incense or a candle.
- Get moving. It’s thought that perhaps someone afflicted with laziness might have a blocked Solar Chakra. The way to heal this is not to stay sedentary or to do less, it’s to move your body and generate as much energy as you can. If you have to start out small, do that. There are soooooo many ways to move your body, though! Think of chakra alignment as your excuse.
Trust your gut. It’s impossible to have any kind of an outer glow if you’re suffering inside. Your physical health starts in your gut. See your doctor or make the life changes you need to feel your best.
Sexual Healing. Is Orange the Sexiest Color?
Our in-house energy healer shows us how to turn it on by re-adjusting our secret sex spot, the Sacral Chakra.
Just below your belly button lies a whole energetic world all about sex. It’s called your Sacral Chakra, and because of its physical location, the Sacral Chakra refers to women’s sex organs but has special meaning for men, also. The Sacral Chakra is the second of the seven chakras.
Most women, they’ll recognize the Sacral Chakra as the place where they’ve suffered period cramps and labor pains. It’s believed that for both sexes the rise and fall of libido live here. (Though, always keep in mind that sex and intimacy are about our whole self and not just one area.) Those with lower back issues potentially have a blockage in this chakra. Sacral Chakra misalignment can also cause reproductive problems, urinary tract infections, or issues with the bladder, kidneys, or adrenals. This is the area of creative expression. A blocked Sacra Chakra is also associated with co-dependency or any other unhealthy sexual connection.
Orange is the color associated with the Sacral Chakra. It’s the color of passion and warmth. Creativity and joy. Success and determination. In the world of chakras, it is also the color of sexuality. As a reminder, sexuality isn’t always about physical sex, it also refers to gender identity, as well as sexual attraction.
If you read my last article all about the first chakra, the Root Chakra, you know that reading your own chakras is an incredibly simple and easy ritual you can do just about anywhere. To test your chakras, place your hands one on top of the other, position them about two inches from the top of your head and slowly move downward over the center of your body. Pay attention to what you feel and the emotions that come up. An unbalanced chakra feels intense and unruly and will make you stop in your tracks. Even though the Root Chakra is the first in the order, we test them from our last (Crown Chakra), downward.
Here are a few easy things you can do today to align your Sacral Chakra and live your sexiest/most intimate/most creative life:
- Wear orange. While clothing might be the first to come to mind, you can always wear orange in the form of healing stone jewelry, like orangey citrine and carnelian. Orange underpants would be especially healing.
- MUSK. There are so many rich, sexy fragrances that will open up your Sacral Chakra, including cardamom, chamomile, eucalyptus, patchouli, rose, and ylang-ylang. You can utilize these balancing scents in an oil diffuser or wear them (they must be safe to wear!) on your pressure points and on your chakra area.
- Open wide. Your hips, we mean. Check out some safe yoga hip opening positions, and remember to take it little by little.
- Back up. What is your lower back telling you right now? Does it feel tight or sore? It may be neglected and in need of alignment, stretches and a little love and attention. Seek an expert to help you if your lower back needs strengthening.
- Eat It. Try orange foods that are rich in Omega-3s (like salmon), but also the array of delicious fruits and veggies that reflect this healing color: mangoes, apricots, sweet potatoes, and of course, oranges and their juice.
- Rub a dub dub. Take a bath. Water is associated with this chakra. Maybe what you need is a soothing bath. For extra healing, try an organic soap in one of the sexy scents from #2 above.
- Sit & Stay. Yes, it’s that simple. Plant your Root Chakra (base of your spine) down on the ground and breathe and be still. Restlessness is one of the signs of Sacral Chakra’s misalignment. Stillness is sometimes all we need.
- See the light. Close your eyes and imagine yourself surrounded by warm, orange light.
Most importantly, as with all chakra work, pay attention to whatever comes up during your practice. Chakra work is one of the most loving and intimate experiences we can give ourselves. It’s great to try something new, but it can be unsettling, too. The tears are okay. So is laughter. New memories might surface. It’s all part of the process.
Liza is a Reiki Master Teacher specializing in distance healing. Discover more about her practice and her classes at thebiggreenheart.com.
Sexual Healing. Getting to the Root (Chakra) of Things.
Want to improve your sex life? Start at the bottom with easy chakra work you can perform today.
For most, when they first hear the word “sex” they think about the physical: Sex is something you physically engage in with someone else. It’s only after the word marinates that we remember that sex is about so much more: connection, intimacy, and, most importantly, our relationship with ourselves. That’s not to say that sweaty, stinky physical sex isn’t often exactly what we want and need, it’s only saying that even the most animalistic desires can be enhanced when we keep our sexual centers in balance.
Our body is filled with likely countless spinning wheels of energy, and we’ve located and named seven of them. Knowing and caring for our chakras is an underrated and super easy way for us to get in touch with ourselves. Chakras can be in so many phases, but when they are “open” and flowing, we can live in a better state of balance which affects everything we do in life.
To test your chakras, place your hands one on top of the other, and position them about two inches from the top of your head and slowly move downward over the center of your body. Pay attention to what you feel where and the emotions that come up.
The first chakra is the Root Chakra, located at the base of your spine. Because we place our hands in front, you can go ahead and reference your lower abdominal region. Traditionally, the Root Chakra is associated with the male sex organs, but it’s impossible to ignore this chakra’s placement for absolutely everyone. The Root Chakra associated with the color red, one of passion and desire, but also anger and celebration.
When I teach chakras the question always comes up: “Hey! Why is the Root Chakra Number One? Should it be the last one? Don’t we start at the top of the head or something?” Here’s what I tell them: Think of yourself like a flower. Yes, we see the flower as a beautiful bloom, but really, it starts at the root. Without the root, there is no flower. This is as symbolic as it is 100% accurate and true. Without the root, we don’t have much, do we?
Considering where it’s located, at the base of the abdomen, it’s no secret that the Root Chakra is symbolic of life. When you practice sitting cross-legged and truly grounding yourself, notice how the base of your spine seems truly meant to “ground you”. What happens when we feel ungrounded? Nothing good—and that’s what happens when you’re Root Chakra is out of whack. The Root Chakra rules safety and security—water, food, shelter, and so much more—things that could have been threatened during your youngest, most formative years. We are all healing from things we’re not consciously aware have happened to us. And it’s never, ever your fault, but as an adult, it’s your responsibility to control what you put out into the world. How this affects you sexually is obvious: The more secure you feel, the deeper you connect with others. The better you’ll communicate, enjoy, and open up in every way.
Here are a few easy things you can do today to give your Root Chakra the love it deserves:
- Wear red. Any coincidence red is considered the color of desire? Not likely, as it’s the color associated with the root chakra. Red can be bright and beautiful or dark and mysterious. And it’s all good if you decide it is.
- Rock it out. When choosing a stone or crystal—don’t think too much. Choose something that makes you feel good. Red crystals are believed to spark passion. Garnet is a stone of abundance. Orangey-red carnelian is believed to empower and strengthen us. Red jasper is a nurturing stone. Don’t think, just let your heart decide. Keep these stones close at hand to absorb their healing properties.
- “Ground” yourself. This expression didn’t come about by accident. Plant that Root Chakra right into the ground—yes, outside!—sit up straight and soak up Mother Nature’s goodness. If you want to get moving, take off your shoes and walk around. (When’s the last time you did this outside?)
- Just breathe. Yes, yes--you breathe to live, but do you breathe with intention? Yoga is an excellent way to re-learn breathing, and also create healthy grounding rituals.
- Imagine. While you’re breathing—and walking, grounding—close your eyes and imagine yourself surrounded by a loving red light.
Just like going to the gym, creating a healing balance is something you tend to do on a regular basis if you want real results. This is your life, and if you want a better connection with yourself—that can lead to a more loving connection with others, even under the sheets—you’ll make the commitment.
Sexual Healing: Your Big Green Heart
In the first installment of her ongoing series, our resident Reiki Master Teacher shows us that it’s so easy to offer yourself much-needed comfort when you need it.
Some say the goal of life is to be happy, but when you work as an energy healer as I do, I like to say that the goal in life is to be balanced. Balance makes all of your relationships better, starting, most essentially, with yourself. Balance is a lot easier than it sounds, especially if you’re forced to live amongst other humans, which generally includes crosstown traffic, your crabby boss, family matters—all of it. Life isn’t designed for “balance”, it’s designed for living.
There’s something about the word “chakra” that intimidates some people, so let me break it down in a simple way you’ll never forget. We are all energy and, thus, self-perpetuating human machines. We all have energetic rivers, if you will—some big, some small—that runs within us. Chakras, specifically, are like spinning energetic wheels. When referring to chakras, though there can be dozens throughout our body, we’ve identified seven major ones, starting at the base of your spine and working your way up towards the top of your head. Each is associated with its own color and element of our physical and emotional well-being. They are: 1. The Root Chakra (Red, Basic Needs); 2. Sacral Chakra (Orange, Sex & Creativity); 3. Solar Chakra (Yellow, Wisdom & Power); 4. Heart Chakra (Green, Love & Healing); 5. Throat Chakra (Blue, Speech & Communication); 6. Third Eye Chakra (Indigo, Awareness & Intuition); 7. Crown Chakra (Purple, Spirituality).
There are techniques that balance each chakra individually and help to create more mind/body/spirit balance, but I’m going to let you in on a quick and dirty spiritual secret for comfort and balance when you’re in a pinch: The Heart Chakra balances all other chakras. If we think of our bodies as machines that need tune-ups, this would be the works-in-a-pinch kind. It doesn’t mean you don’t need to work on all the rest of it—every chakra counts—it only means this is something you can do absolutely anywhere, any time.
Your Heart Chakra is located in the middle of your chest, below your collarbones. If you are in a situation where you feel especially anxious, or craving self-love, place both of your hands on your Heart Chakra and breathe slowly and deeply. If it’s helpful, create a phrase or series of words you need to hear at that time, something that reflects the inner compassion you have for yourself, you can repeat them aloud or in your mind. Keep it simple. As I tell my students when in doubt start with “I love you”. If you can find a peaceful place, that’s helpful, though this can be done absolutely anywhere. Envision yourself surrounded by a green light, or if it’s possible to plan, wear something green—clothing, jewelry—that gives your green heart the energy to comfort you whenever you need it.
Liza is a Reiki Master Teacher specializing in distance healing. Discover more about her practice and her classes at thebiggreenheart.com.
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